25 September 2009

Unemployed

I didn't sleep until 4AM this morning. I was extremely stressed out and experiencing major anxiety all week. I was so overwhelmed that 1.5 Ambien and 2 Percocet didn't put me sleep. Why was I so stressed you might be wondering? Well, Doba terminated my loyal employment of almost 4 years on Tuesday, my 25th birthday no less. 

Doba decided that they were no longer going to be able to continue the relationship because I used all of my Paid Time Off (PTO) for sickness and accidents. I am devestated by this, but oddly relieved. For the better part of a year I have been through many health trials (8 months of chronic migraines, 6 root canals, torn up knee, food poisoning, shoulder dislocation, etc.) and through them all I never felt like I had the opportunity to clear my head and fully recover because I was always worried about my job. I no longer have that concern so hopefully I can focus on getting my mental and phsyical issues in order again. I've got 3 different doctor appointments scheduled already for next week. 

I am trying my best to have a positive outlook, to see the silver lining, but I just can't right now. I know I will find something else, I'm just so overwhelmed. I am so overwhelmed with the events of this past week and year that I went to the doctor yesterday and got some anti-anxiety medication (Xanax) it seems to be helping, but right now I can hardly type I am so nervous and scared feeling that I have zero direction in my life. I ended up taking two last night (or this morning rather) to help me relax so I could get a few hours of shut eye before my long last day of working at Doba. :( I am so sad. I loved my job, truly I did. I just don't understand, I had a rough year health-wise and emotionally, things that are out of my control, and I get fired for it.

So, the next seven days are going to be all about me. I am going to do the things that I want, things that make me happy. Spend time with my dog, sleep in late, tan, and work out. Tie up a bunch of loose ends I haven't had the time or energy to deal with until now. After my "all about me vaca" my aggressive job search begins! I hope I am able to find something that helps me grow as an individual and work well with a group of similarly open minded people. I may also look into returning to school. I would probably qualify for some grants or assistant since I am unemployed. This may be the route I need to take.

If anyone knows of any HR, administrative assistant type jobs in Utah-County I would appreciate the information on them. I need at least $40,000/year to stay in my current living conditions. I have a resume ready to send, just shoot me an email with directions and the job description. Also, I've updated my email address to meagenridley at gmail .com. I'll check the other one regularly but I'm trying to get everything moved over ASAP.

I asked Holli to move in with me for a few months until the end of the year. I'm excited for the time we'll get to spend and that she will be able to help me a bit with rent and the Tonka-monster. I love her so much more than I could ever put into words. She has been staying with me in some compacity for the last month and I am so very grateful for this. She helps tremendously with Tonka and she cleans and makes me not feel so lonely. She and Madi are my very best friends and I need their support right now. My parents are very loving and supporting and I know they will do their best to keep me a float until I find something new.

Since I know a lot of my Doba coworkers read my blog, I wish each of you the very best. Please stay in touch via email (above or the link to the right) and Facebook. I have a feeling I will be either offline for the next few days to week or online a ton looking for jobs. We'll see. Enjoy your weekends and I will do my best to make good use of the time off I unexpectedly have. 

11 comments:

John Pender said...

So sorry to hear that, Meg. Although I can understand Doba's position from a productivity and monetary aspect, I do feel that it was a little crass. But whatever. I'm sure you'll find something that suits you. Who wouldn't want a bubbly blond Ridley working in their office?
BTW, please change my link over there to http://johnpender.net I deleted the blogger account this morning. Send people to my real site! :)

Meagen Ridley said...

I'll change the link sometime this weekend. I need to make some other updates to my blog, but don't have time right this second.

jayni & ben said...

Meags... Is this for real? When you told me this I did NOT want to believe it, nor do I want to believe it now. Makes me sooo sad. Thank you for all the wonderful times. I will miss you the VERY VERY most at Doba. You are such a good friend. I think everyone at Doba will miss you. You just were so good at what you did. I don't think everyone knows everything you really did. But I guess they will soon find out. I wish you the best. I will call you next week when you are not on your vaca time anymore. Love you!!!

Unknown said...

Whoa that is quite the blow. I don't have any great advice. Wish I had a great fix to your problem.

It will get better, I'm sure of it. AND don't forget to smile!

-nick and whitley- said...

wow.. this has been such a shock to me. I am so sorry. i'll miss you sweetheart. i wish i could have seen you on Friday, Brynlee was in the office.. i wish you the best and i hope everything works out well for you. School would be great! good luck if that's the road you take! I miss you already.

LaCimOuRiTsEn said...

The job search is tough right now. I've been looking since March. Don't check everyday or it will upset you! Check everyother day.
Good Luck! Find me something too. I'm a $30,000 a year kinda gal!

Meagen Ridley said...

Laci! Girl, do you want to go get lunch this week?

I'll send you a message on FB with my number later today or if you still have it, it's the same one I had in high school.

Let me know!

Meagen

Andrea said...

That really sucks! I certainly know how you feel and hope that you fare better than I have in the job search. Just a thought...are you on linked in? I know that some employers post jobs on that site before any others. Also, don't disregard craigslist. I've actually gotten more interviews off of jobs that I have applied for off of there than Monster or anything of the "job sites". Those ones are usually major companies with billions of applicants at a time.

AND my husband runs a temporary staffing office here. It's not a long term solution, but a little bit of extra cash while you're looking. Of course, I'm sure you have already applied for unemployment. If you haven't, it's really easy and you can do it online. It's not much, but it helps.

As for as grants for school, just take into consideration that they go off of last year's tax returns.

Let me know if I can do anything for you. I've been doing the job search thing for a ridiculously long period of time and have plenty of experience.

Jobi Niu said...

Dude... when JAyni told me she was like crying.. that's freakin BS dude! On your birthday... JACKED UP!! I'm sorry.

Sad Stu said...

Meagen, I just got the news! I, too, got the axe from my former employer on my birthday. But like you, it was a relief. A big one actually. I couldn't quit, but getting laid off, that wasn't so bad (I've been fired twice before, so not getting fired was kind of nice heh heh).

If it helps, this is what I did. I got on the unemployment and by budgeting super tight I was able to make my car payment and mortgage and all my other bills for the 3 months I was without pay.

Then I simply started shotgun-blasting resumes out to the list of top 100 fastest growing companies in Utah. After about 30 of those, I got callbacks on 5 of them (actual offers from 3 of them) all of which did not have the position I was seeking listed as open on their careers pages. But I figured every company needs an SEO, so I just blasted my resume out to every company I could get an email address on.

Similarly, I imagine every company needs a good admin assistant. But honestly, I'd take some time for yourself to relax and heal up. I was off for 4 months total (thankfully I got a severance that covered me for the first couple weeks), and the break was really nice. It gave me time to reflect, think about things, and get a bunch of side projects completed that I never had time for before.

I don't know if you heard, but I'm actually going back to Doba. I was really looking forward to working with you again, but this news makes me really sad. But chin up... with time, I think you'll find it's a blessing in disguise. I'll be wishing you the best!

And hey, I know you're not a big poker fan, but we play every other Friday and you're always welcome to join us.

CW said...

Meagen,

Sad to hear about your tough times. I think I can probably relate to how you feel. This might sound a little crazy, but one thing that really helped me was to try and focus on being grateful for the time I had at my Doba: all the people I met, the things I learned, and the experience I got.

The day I was fired was a bit tough for me too. It wasn't my b-day, but it was my first day back from paternity leave and nothing puts the pressure on you to have a good job and "be a provider" like having your first newborn baby at home.

While I was very sad, I tried to dwell on all the good stuff that I experienced. It made me realize I had a lot to be grateful for. In fact, I think I even got a little sentimental and wrote Jeremy (the guy who had just fired me) a thank you letter for all the good times and the great years.

It helped... A LOT. I was able to move on and get to the next phase of my life. Not only that, I was able to maintain friendships I probably wouldn't have if I'd dwelt on all the reasons I thought I shouldn't have been fired. My reasoning was "They didn't have to hire me in the first place, would I rather they hadn't?" And my answer was, "Heck no!" I too loved my job and had a lot of great time and great memories from it, so I decided just to be glad I'd been able to work there in the first place.

Since leaving Mother Doba, I've talked to several people who were fired or let go at one point or another and many of them are still bitter and wanted to swap spiteful stories. It's tempting to engage, and I won't say that I never succumbed to the temptation, but it really doesn't accomplish anything and it didn't make me or them feel any better.

I know this is long for a blog comment, but I just wanted you to know that you WILL find something and life will look up again. Stay positive and keep an attitude of gratitude and you'll feel a lot better about things. Good luck!

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