28 December 2010


I went tanning tonight for the first time in probably 8 months. It was legendary! It was the best 9 minutes I've had in months. Tanning is my sanctuary. AH, I love it.

22 December 2010

Playing in the Snow

We got 8.5 inches of snow the last few days, most of it falling Monday night and Marley love love loves it! I played with him in it last night for about a half hour or so. He's getting pretty good at catching snowballs in his mouth if you throw them up in the air. Tonka struggles when there's that much snow on the ground...because his legs aren't that long. Mar usually has to run around and stomp it all down for a bit before Tonka can join in the fun. Here's a few pictures and a video of them in their winter gear playing in the snow. 


20 December 2010

Snow Gear

Tonka is ready for the snow! I got a gift card (thank you!) to Walmart for Christmas so I used a bit of it to get the little monster a winter coat. I was worried he wouldn't like it since he tends to be anti-clothes, but I think since I don't have to put it over his head to get it on him he was okay with it. The hood is my favorite part. I love that it covers his belly, since that seems to be the part of him that gets the wettest when he plays in the snow.

19 December 2010


So I redesigned my blog, obviously. It was definitely time for an overhaul and I like the end result. It's been over a year since I've made any changes to it and I really like the new options Blogger has available.

I'm so ready for the holiday season to be over with. Seriously, I know that people around me just want to help, but they just don't understand how no Christmas is so much easier than attempting some broken resemblance of one. Call me Scrooge, but there are some things that a Christmas tree and lights just can't fix. Sorry to burst your little bubble but I just want January to get here as soon as possible.

I miss Madi, Brady, and Kelvin. I wish I could see them more often. Things don't seem so bad when I'm around Kelvin. And Madi makes me laugh like only my sisters can. They just understand things that no one else can.

I just caught up on all the new posts in my Google Reader and I've decided I can't read Nie Nie Dialogues anymore. I feel for her situation and I think it's remarkable the trials she has overcome but I can't handle seeing anymore naked pictures of her kids. I mean honestly, her one son is like 4 and is running around the house completely naked in angel wings? You can see his boy parts in one of the shots. Does anyone else find this seriously disturbing? And apparently he still takes baths in the kitchen sink. I don't have kids, but I think sink baths stop being appropriate when your kids start crawling.

I used to think that I'd never wish someone ill, but lately, I want to study voodoo just so I can curse a few people. I can't take much more of this "trial period" in my life. I just become more cynical and bitter with each passing day. Nothing seems to change despite the efforts I make. There's this saying 'What you do in life echoes in eternity'. Well, I sure as hell hope so. There are a few people I hope never out run the choices they've made.

I hate my hair. It's terribly ugly. It's like 3 different shades of blonde and it hasn't been cut in at least 8 months. I want to get it done so badly but there's always something that comes up with a higher priority. I avoid mirrors because I'm repulsed by what I see. My hair isn't blonde or maintained, I'm no longer tan, and my once cute curvy figure is nonexistent. I feel like I lose a little bit of myself with everything that is taken away; my family, my car, my movies, my independence. I know material things don't make a person, but it's still a part of who I thought I was. I don't know who I am anymore. I'm living, but I don't remember the last time I felt alive.

16 December 2010

The Best Chili Ever - Crock Pot Pinto Bean Chili

I've been craving homemade chili for a few days now. I've never tried to make any before so I looked up a few recipes online but I didn't find any that really jumped out at me so I decided to just wing it and hope for the best. I don't usually like to toot my own horn...but.. TOOT! TOOT! My chili came together just like I knew what I was doing! It's so yummy! So I thought I'd share my recipe with everyone. Enjoy!

4 C        cooked pinto beans (I used dry beans and followed the directions on the bag)
1 lb        ground beef, cooked (seasoned to taste with salt and pepper)
1 med    onion, chopped
1 med    green bell pepper, chopped
4 cloves fresh garlic, minced
4 8oz      cans tomato paste
1 15oz    can diced tomatoes
1 tbsp     crushed red pepper
2 tsp       sugar
1 tsp       cumin
1 tsp       oregano
1 tsp       kosher salt
1/2 tsp    black pepper
1/2 tsp    paprika

In a large non stick pot saute onion in a few tablespoons of water until they start to brown. You may need to add a little more water during the process to keep them from burning. Add bell pepper and garlic.   Cook until bell peppers soften. Add two cans of tomato paste, diced tomatoes, crushed red pepper, sugar, cumin, oregano, kosher salt, black pepper, and paprika. Fold in beef and pinto beans. Add remaining cans of tomato paste until desired liquidity is achieved. Once everything is mixed together, put chili into a crock pot and simmer on low heat for 1-2 hours. Serve with shredded cheese and sour cream. Enjoy!
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