08 September 2011

Early Morning of Day 5

I can't sleep. My heart was pounding so hard it woke me up. I HATE not sleeping and it's too late to take another Ambien. So, I've been reading blogs on other people getting off medications and lower back pain. And I started Sons of Anarchy over. I love me some SAMCRO. If you don't watch that show currently, you need to get on it. I mean Charlie Hunnam. Need I say more?

I got in for a 90 minute massage last night after I posted Day 4. It totally relaxed my body. Except I'm not sure it really helped my back pain, it's traveling down the back of my left leg now and it's like wrapping around my hip into my stomach. It almost feels like I have a ovarian cyst, only I can feel the direct "pain line" if you will from my back.

This MRI better give me some answers. I'm terrified they are going to tell me I have early signs of my Dad's diseases: DISH and Ankylosing Spondylitis. Read those and you'll know why. I don't know what I would do or how I would handle that news. I'd probably be in a dark room with a bottle or two of tequila for a few days. I have 3 mini bottles of Sprite, 1 can of Coke, and 3 cans of Dr. Pepper sitting around in my room. I should probably just quit all of my vices while I'm at it. Hahaha, I have no intention of giving up my Coke and DP any time in the near future. That's just stupid.

Thanks to everyone for the flood of supporting comments, emails, and texts. It really means so much to me. I was pretty nervous about putting all of this out there, but I think it really was the best idea. I feel like it has given me a huge level of accountibility. I have thought every single day that I just want to go back on my medicine full throttle. I could if I wanted to, no one is forcing me to quit this treatment plan, it's 100% my choice. But I feel like it would be disappointing to the almost 300 unique visitors to my site in the last 4 days. Apparently, people like reading about detoxing and drugs? Anyway, thank you for the support. I appreciate it.


Bensons said...

Do you think maybe a visit to the chiropractor might help with your back pain? I've never been to one, but I know people who swear by them for helping with a lot of things.

You are so brave doing this! Keep it up! :)

...As a side note, I didn't realize your dad had Ankylosing spondylitis, my nephew and brother-in-law both have that. I too hope you are not diagnosed with that.

Meagen Ridley said...

I go to the chiropractor from time to time. The problem is I am usually dying after I get adjusted, then I get relief a day or two later. I just don't want to go through that without wanting to take any meds for it.

My dad was diagnosed with it like 10 years ago. It's awful!

J N H said...

I would not recommend a chiropractor for either DISH or Ankylosing spondylitis. Both seem like a rough pathology. I am SO sorry you have to go through this at such a young age! My mom is weaning from 8percocets/day AND morphine extended release (it's scary stuff.) It's rough and I hate to see my mom go through all that. I wish you the BEST of luck.
For my back patients I recommend getting in the pool and dangling from a noodle. Let the pool provide some relief by traction and hydrostatic pressure. Let me know!

Bensons said...

I don't blame ya, I wouldn't want to go get adjusted in that case either! I'm obviously not great at giving helpful suggestions. Something like hydrotherapy, as mentioned above, definitely sounds promising though.

Oh, I didn't mean go to a chiropractor if you were diagnosed with either of those, I would imagine it would make the pain worse with a condition/disease that affects the spine.

And your poor dad, that is horrible! I can't imagine! :(

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